I Kicked Luis Guzman in the Face

Short film directed by Sherwin Shilati

Starring Matt Ryan, Travis Young, Michelle Luchese, and Luis Guzman

Review By Leslie Morton

              This convoluted story is as painful to write about as it was to watch.  Jason, a white collar drone who has no tangible friends, immerses himself in the world of Myspace.  When he meets up with his two, yes only two, Myspace buds, Mark and Jennifer, he tries to impress them.  Everything that Mark or Jennifer count as an accomplishment, Jason tries to one up them on.  Gee, no wonder the guy has no amigos!

When Mark begins to brag that he is working on the movie set with Luis Guzman and has been spending many friendly days playing poker with him, Jason blurts out, “I kicked Luis Guzman in the face!”  The story gets out in Myspace land and Jason becomes Mr. Popular.  The story spreads and becomes a viral sensation to the point of Luis Guzman finding out about the supposed roundhouse to the kisser himself.  SPOILER ALERT!!! Luis Guzman goes to Jason’s sparse apartment to confront him on his alleged assault.  Jason, in a state of panic DOES kick Luis in the face, high point of the entire movie, and Luis proceeds to beat him to death.  He kills the poor schmuck.  Within a couple of weeks, the media gets wind that the guy who “kicked Luis Guzman in the face” has been murdered.  An editor for Entertainment Weekly calls Luis to have him confirm or deny the story.  Luis tries to redeem his actions by confirming that yes, Jason indeed kicked him in the face.  The end!

              What??  I’ll just give you the notes that I took during the film in bullet form.  They sum up the movie and don’t require me to spend any more time on this film than necessary.

• confusing
• awkward
• just plain depressing
• disjointed
• lovely cinematography
• mediocre acting

This movie deserves to be kicked in the face which is why I give it one bourbon out of five.